The exasperated looks, the sneers, and the giggles suggest somehow that you deserve what you are getting, you are wrecking things for others simply by showing up. So many explained to us that the worst thing about flying wasn’t these chronic physical reminders that you “just don’t fit.” It’s how others – complete strangers – treat you while you are struggling to fit. Of all the places they went, many told us that planes were the absolute worst getting in and out of tiny seats, using the tiny bathroom, and the humiliation of having to request a seat belt extender at take-off. Some planned their entire day around navigating between spaces that could accommodate them. Like the effort to exit parked cars in tight spaces and the lack of chairs that could hold them in public buildings.

They detailed the many ways that the world around them constantly reminded them that they literally didn’t fit. Our participants began their treatment with high body masses. It changed the way we see physical spaces around us, including that narrow airline seat. Six years ago, our team at Arizona State University began a project tracking the experiences of patients undergoing weight loss surgery at a large nearby hospital. As a New Zealander who lives in the US, and an American married to a Paraguayan who do research together in many other countries, we are all too familiar with the experience of the 16.6-18 inch economy seat for many hours at a time. Mostly though, unless you happen to be the one being stigmatized, it’s pretty much invisible.

Stigma is all around us – messages communicated about how you don’t fit, don’t belong, or have no value.

Lazy and crazy shipping